Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Mean girls

Everyone has heard of the 'mean girls,' but do as many people realize that some of those girls grow up and become 'mean moms??' I do not mean mean in the sense that they are mean to their children, but to other moms.

It is a brutal world in mom-land!! What I am referring to is women who get in cliques in neighborhoods, schools, wherever and exclude moms AND the children from 'the outside.' I cannot help but wonder if these particular women are mean girls turned mean moms, or if this territory is new to them. I have been fortunate from a relatively young age to be able to decipher the good from the bad (the real from the fake) and be able to live my own way happily in spite of these women and their attitude that the world is theirs. In high school, I was a happy band geek who had plenty of friends, and in college had a great group of friends from various backgrounds and majors. I always had a core group, but always had friends in the periphery also. That is just me. I make friends where I go.

Which is why I find it so bizarre to enter a space, smile and say hello, only to have a bag placed on a chair indicating that it is 'saved,' or to have someone get up because 'that lady took so-and-so's spot.' WTF, people?! You are honestly going to teach your children to exclude people they don't know??? I feel sorry for them...not for you, because I see through you and your insecurities, but why teach this to your kids?

I am a proud, working mom of one. I do not fit any particular mold of being a mom, and I am ok with that. I have plenty of mom friends who do NOT participate in these behaviors. I also have made friends in school, at work, etc. I am not craving relationships with these 'mean moms,' but having my and my child's existence acknowledged would be nice.

I will continue to teach my child to make friends where he goes and to be proud that he can enter any situation and quickly make friends. This will get him far in life. What will become of the kids who will inevitably end up split up from their neighbor friends, or cousins somewhere along the line? Hopefully a kid like mine will offer a friendly smile and invite them to play.