Time

I called my husband in a panic this morning after a chiropractor appointment. You see, the good dr told me it would take time to fix my back...and I freaked!! You mean, you won't just adjust me and fix me NOW?! What is wrong with you?!

He recommended a therapy that would last 5-6 weeks and I may actually feel worse before I feel better. WHAT?! NO! I don't have time for this. So I left, and frantically phoned my husband who told me to go back to our family doc, get a second opinion and we'd go from there. How did he say that like it is ok???? I yelled/cried to him that I won't be able to go back today, and then they will order studies that will take time...I don't have time for that?!

And what if this and what if that? And the house is a mess and I can't clean it because of my back...and what if I can't work? This was the worst one...to which he responded, 'take this one thing at a time. you're jumping all over the place.' And I had nothing to say back to that. All my ranting and raving, and it NEVER occurred to me to take this one 'thing' at a time.

Some people in my life will tell me I just take on too much. Or that I need to slow down. Or that I need to appreciate what I have. 'Smell the roses,' my mom says....but that's not me. It is like taking someone who is critically shy and handing them a microphone in a crowded room. They are going to panic. That is just them.

When you tell me I am being forced to slow down, I panic. So, I started to calm down, made myself a list and made some phone calls. Doctor ordered a test which will be done tomorrow and new meds to help in the meantime. I am ok with that. I feel like I am about to embark on a wild ride, but am humbled by 'take one thing at a time.'

Perhaps it is time for that adult-onset ADHD testing too...